Silent Shrieking....

Heluuu

2009-07-19T21:48:00.000-07:00

Haven't updated this thing in a while. Uh, well I got over my sickness. Wasn't fun at all though. Got a new puppy. Cute little thing.
Umm,....went to efy. Had a blast. Went to girls camp and got "sick" there and came home early.
After the amazing spiritual stuff at efy, everything else seems so dull. 'tis sad.
Annnd I have nothing more to say at the moment so i guess i'll cut it off here. Just wanted to tell people (ha. just mom and dad, more like) tat I didn't die. (they already know so there really isn't any point to this post then. I did it out of boredom. There! That's my reason. -.-)

I want to die.

2009-06-19T00:19:00.000-07:00

So a neighbor had an illness of some sort. I have no idea what the difference between a flu and virus is or whatever other names there are but Reed got it, Abby now has it, and so do I apparently. I'm not sure if I should have eaten more today or not. Totally forgot breakfast(we got up and were out early), ate an apple which isn't that filling, shared curly fries with Abby, went out to lunch at a crap mexican restaurant, came home and didn't eat for a while. I was hungry but ignored it and it went away. I don't know if I just got used to it or what. And then we watched a movie, I ate two pieces of fiber bread because I knew I had to eat something soon because I was getting almost dizzy. By the way, fiber bread tastes like crap. I never minded it before. It wasn't good but I didn't care then. All of a sudden I do now. It's weird. And then my body acknowledges that it's starving and makes me eat two more slices even though I freakin' hate it. I didn't know what else to eat and it was easy to get so.....>.<
So now I don't know what I feel. Half of my stomach says, "I'm starving, why aren't you feeding me?!" while the other half says, "OH NO, I'm so stuffed I'm about to explode." So I have literally NO FRIKKIN IDEA. I'm also really dizzy now and am not sure if it's from the hunger or just the whole 'being sick' thing. I need a bowl. Gah, I feel like digging a hole, getting in, and dying.

Poe Poem

2009-06-13T11:53:00.000-07:00

So Abby just showed me this. Read the haunted palace again but think of the palace as a person.
Poe isn't describing a haunted palace he's describing a person going mad.
May I just say I FRIGGIN LOVE YA, POE.
ahem...*pushes up invisible glasses*

Cleaning

2009-06-13T10:50:00.000-07:00

So we cleaned Abby and Reed's apartment today. Guess how long it took?
30 freaking minutes.

I'm not so sure I want to go back home anymore where cleaning takes maybe 8 hours. Sorry Mom.
But really, I'm having a great time here in the land o' the Mormons. Mountains right outside my window, no smokers, cute babeh, more laptop time...
My schedule: Abby waked me up in the morning, I trudge over into the next room and sleep in their bed until Andy waked me up, take him out, give him a bottle, wait 'til he's done, change diaper, change clothes, give him his toys (his favorite is the rubber duck that squeaks when he chews on it which I find quite hilarious), put him back to bed when his eyes are red. It's been going like this for a while and I don't think it'll change anytime soon. Then I get on my computer, download music, draw on my kickbutt art program (paint.net), write a little (i need to get better about that, eh), and then surf the Twilight sites. Then Abby comes home, I take a shower and get dressed and we're good to go. Though usually she does homework and I stay on my computer and get showered and dressed later. Then I eat, at that time it's usually noon or later. Sorry, I just forget. And if i eat my junk, unhealthy pretzels then I'm left dizzy and feeling sick for a while so I don't do that anymore. Most days I eat a few grapes and 2 pieces of the fiber bread or whatever. Sometimes I don't eat the fiber bread, I need to get better about that too. Oh! Now I'm eating my bean soup in the mornings. There's a lot of it and it's dang good. Eh, I won't say any more because I'm getting bored and stuff. Currently looking up info on German Shepards.

2009-06-12T23:33:00.000-07:00

He gave to her on that day, a single red rose.
'twas bold and bright and beautiful, the special one he chose.
'was for the one he loved, a girl, the very of his dreams.
He gave to her a second one, sitting under dim moonbeams.
The third was received by her on their walk by the misty lake.
The fourth was given by him and by the girl, indeed, she did take.
Ah, what happy times were these when love was beginning to blossom. Feelings raised, kisses exchanged, and neither being lonesome.
Sadly this reign of happiness could not continue on.
A tragedy occurring stopped this, he discovered at the dawn.
While running out into the street, too blinded by joy to see,
A car sped along, the driver drunk, blinded by alcohol was she.
He did not give her the rose that day. That terribly depressing day.
He gave it to no one. It sat there, withered, and then rotted slowly away.
He attended the funeral, and silently he did stand.
A single black rose, clutched in his constricted hand.
He returned home with heavy heart and eyes wet with tears.
Up in his room, his sanctuary, his own screams assaulted his ears.
The smell, the stench, of rotting rose
remained there forevermore.

-Claire E. Anderson

The Haunted Palace: my favorite poem

2009-06-12T18:41:00.000-07:00

In the greenest of our valleys
By good angels tenanted,
Once a fair and stately palace -
Radiant palace - reared its head.
In the monarch Thought's dominion -
It stood there!
Never seraph spread a pinion
Over fabric half so fair!

Banners yellow, glorious, golden,
On its roof did float and flow,
(This - all this - was in the olden
Time long ago,)
And every gentle air that dallied,
In that sweet day,
Along the ramparts plumed and pallid,
A winged odor went away.

Wanderers in that happy valley,
Through two luminous windows, saw
Spirits moving musically,
To a lute's well-tuned law,
Round about a throne where, sitting
(Porphyrogene!)
In state his glory well-befitting,
The ruler of the realm was seen.

And all with pearl and ruby glowing
Was the fair palace door,
Through which came flowing, flowing, flowing,
And sparkling evermore,
A troop of Echoes, whose sweet duty
Was but to sing,
In voices of surpassing beauty,
The wit and wisdom of their king.

But evil things, in robes of sorrow,
Assailed the monarch's high estate.
(Ah, let us mourn! - for never morrow
Shall dawn upon him desolate!)
And round about his home the glory
That blushed and bloomed,
Is but a dim-remembered story
Of the old time entombed.

And travellers, now, within that valley,
Through the red-litten windows see
Vast forms, that move fantastically
To a discordant melody,
While, like a ghastly rapid river,
Through the pale door
A hideous throng rush out forever
And laugh - but smile no more.

-Edgar Allan Poe